Beer reviewers discuss Joetown bar drinks, el Jimador tequila

Welcome back to your weekly intake of mediocre alcohol reviews and jokes. We aren’t scientists, but our jokes are basically the Flintstone gummies of the comedy world.

We all know and love the local bars of St. Joe as they are part of a lot of past and present students’ experiences here.

So, Sam is going to review our favorite drinks from the La and the Middy. Mack, on the other hand, is going to do a little review about a couple of his favorite drinks.

Remember, if you are of age, stop at buzzed and drink responsibly.

**Sam’s Bar Crawl:**

After a long week of school and work, it is a necessity to take a break on Fridays.

One way to do this is to go to the Middy, formally known as the Midway bar, for happy hour. Happy hour runs from 5 to 8 p.m. on Fridays and consists of $3 Long Island Iced Teas.

This is the perfect mix of helping you maximize your buzz without breaking the bank.

Over the last couple of years, the Middy has shifted from a low-key bar to one of the more popular ones in town. With two dart boards and a pair of pool tables, it is the perfect place to hang out with friends in a more laid-back experience than Sal’s or even the La.

If you don’t fancy a nice Long Island Iced Tea, they always have Hamm’s on tap, and you know how we love that around here.

The La has more Friday deals on three-for-$9 and fishbowls. The three-for-$9 are on rail drinks, which include your cheaper mixed beverages. Sadly, vodka red bulls are not included in this deal.

Both of us get the Long Island fishbowl and haven’t had the other flavors they offer. We can’t even tell you what those flavors are to be honest. We know they have a red and blue one, probably.

These are best shared with a friend or two so you can best maximize your buzz.

You may be asking yourself: “What does the La have on the other bars in St. Joe?”

Well, it is no doubt that it is the trough in the men’s bathroom. That is where we have made more friends in a night than anywhere else on Earth.

**Mack’s Thoughts:**

Due to questionable taste buds, I have somehow developed a love for drinks most people wouldn’t care for: Jägermeister and any type of Tequila.

There isn’t much to be said about Jägermeister—it more or less tastes like black licorice. It does invoke some feeling of hanging out at Grandma’s house when you’re eight years old, but other than that, there isn’t much to it. If you like Jaeg without the Red Bull, well, you’re just a different breed and probably would take that as a compliment like I once did.

Recently, I picked up a bottle of el Jimador from the store because it was on sale.

It is a Tequila Añejo which is the yellowish-brown colored one. I don’t really have a preference for which type of tequila I drink, as I haven’t had years of tasting varied brands and types of tequila. But it is safe to say I am a fan of el Jimador so far.

There is one caveat to that: I can only drink this one with everyone’s favorite karaoke song playing. That song is, of course, “Tequila” by The Champs.

That’s all for this week. Due to a mix of work and class, we weren’t able to find time to actually review new drinks, but we will be back next week with something fresher than Will Smith in the 90s.

Are you a single Bennie still feeling the sting of spending Valentine’s Day alone? Well, so is Mack. Lucky for you, he has band-aids and a little gauze for that heart of yours. Anyways, back to choring.