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Opinion

Embrace change: suggestions in order to move forward in life

This is the opinion of Alicia Reif, Pyschologist at the Well-Being Center.

By Alicia A. Reif, PsyD, LP · · 2 min read

It’s hard to move to a new place, to uproot your entire life as you knew it and start anew. The promise and doubt of what a new life may bring can throw you into a tailspin. It is difficult to imagine yourself in an entirely new context, especially when it means making new friends, getting to know a new space and redefining yourself. This happens when you first move into or on from college and can happen every year as you grow into a new version of yourself. Sometimes it feels as though you must reset to step one to keep moving forward.

Good news: you do not have to start over. You have built who you are from your past experiences, choices and intentions. You can continue to build yourself every day with every choice and opportunity. But the first step is settling into the place where you are now.

1. Take stock of where you have been. Remember that the hardships, victories, challenges and obstacles gave you a set of skills that helped you to get to this point in your life. There is no timeline to follow. Make your space one of comfort. Bring parts of home with you and allow yourself to acknowledge where you have come from before you decide where you are going. Part of moving forward is letting go of what you no longer need.

2. Reflect on what is important to you. Identifying what you value will help to guide your future. To discover your values, consider an app that explores values like ACT Coach to explore what is important to you.

3. Consider what you want your future life and self to be. Create an image of what you want based on the values you have identified. This can impact the friends you make, the choices you make and how you seek experiences.

4. Make decisions that align with that vision. Each day you can take steps toward that future self by living according to those values. This is a way to live with less regret and greater joy as you listen to your own deepest desires and reduce the tendency to live according to what everyone else thinks.

You have the opportunity to embrace the move you are making and define yourself as the adult you strive to be. Make yourself your home, celebrate who you have been and embrace the opportunity to mold yourself into who you wish to become. Consider a reflection app on your phone to enhance the process of learning about yourself and challenge yourself to continue to grow.